Happy Dussehra!

Today is VijyaDashami / Dussehra - a festive ocassion which has always intrigued me. As a kid I heard its the day when Ram killed Ravan and it symbolises the victory of good over evil. Back then I thought Ravan must've been a really evil man being the "king of asurs/demons" and he deserved what he got. But as I grew old I came to know that "Ravan" was infact a Brahmin and a very intelligent one at that with vast amount of knowledge. This revelation shook my childhood beliefs about Ravan.

Ever since then I ve tried to find the true meaning of the symbolism of Ram's victory and Ravan's defeat. Isn't it true that "Jab tak Raam hai... Ravan rahega" ? Is it possible that "good" can actually eliminate "evil" from this world ? What does this symbolism mean for me as an individual and for the society that I live in ? Is it just about victory of good over evil ? Are we missing out on the fine print attached to this event thanks to our usual tendency to take a macro view ?

Every Dussehra in particular I like to take a micro view of life. Based on my experiences and understanding of life I try to refine what is "Ram" and what is "Ravan" for me. This I believe is a very important exercise for anyone who wishes to finally sign off from this world as a good human being.

Its very easy to get caught in the web of fast paced life that we now lead and lose perspective of what is good and what is "not good" (I think "evil" is too strong a word and after all the concept of "evil" depends on how we define "good" isn't it ? ) Hence its very important to use the symbolism of such festive ocassions, to take a momentary pause from our routines and get a refined perspective about our lives.

We Indians are blessed to be born in a culture which provides a well defined mechanism for this in the form of Dussehra, Diwali, Raksha Bandhan, Guru Poornima and numerous other big and small festive ocassions... if only we all looked beyond the material things which we've conveniently associated with these festivals, we would be better human beings and consequently our society/nation would be a much better place to live in!

Anyways Wish everyone a Very Happy Dussehra!! Hope you all are able to identify the "Ram" and "Ravan" in your life, thinking, conduct etc.

Here are few lines from a song in the movie "Swades" which come quite close to capturing the essence of "Ram" and "Ravan" for me...

Raam hi toh karuna mein hai, shaanti mein raam hai...
Raam hi hai ekta mein, pragati mein raam hai...
Raam bas bhakton nahin shatru ke bhi chintan mein hai...
Dekh taj ke paap raavan, raam tere mann mein hai...
Raam tere mann mein hai, raam mere mann mein hai...
Raam to ghar ghar mein hai, raam har aangan mein hai...
Mann se raavan jo nikaale, raam uske mann mein hai...
Mann se raavan jo nikaale, raam uske mann mein hai!

Death - "The Moment"

There are moments in life when we feel disappointed or dejected at having missed out on something... it could be ranging from something as trivial as watching our favorite player eclipse a major record live on TV to something which seems really important for the future course that our lives would take example a job opportunity.

The root cause of this being our belief that WE are the ones who are in charge of our lives and its WE who have the power to shape it the way we want. But then there are moments which make a complete mockery of it all.

Moments which leave us stunned

Moments which make us feel absolutely powerless

Moments which compel us to accept how foolish we have been in thinking that we are in control all the time and if we have lost control its our fault

Death is that Moment... which makes it all meaningless and at the same time gives meaning to Life. Because Life when viewed in isolation can muddle up our minds with a false sense of authority. Its Death which gives a perspective to Life, if we are ready to understand it.

The moment when you see a funeral pyre being lit being "The Moment" when Life makes the most sense. Because in the mirage created by the flames you can actually see LIFE... yes an entire Life gone by.

It is also The Moment when you realize that perhaps the only important thing in Life is to express your feelings to your near and dear ones.

Because if you don't seize The Moment when it presents itself, you might not get another opportunity ever again. And trust me this missed opportunity is perhaps the only thing worth regretting... coz you can regret it all your Life.

The Awesomeness of Nothingness...

Its been months now (3 months n 9 days to be precise) since I came back from MDI. And I guess d absence of regular blog posts during this period sends across an impression that I must ve been pretty busy all this while! :)

But nothing can be farther from the reality than this impression. This period has perhaps been the most "vela" period of my life, have done practically "Nothing" all this while.

Am sure activities such as eating, sleeping, sitting all day long in front of d Idiot Box like an Idiot, spamming on various Yahoo Groups or abusing d Social Networking platforms (Yes all 3 - FB, Twitter n Orkut) finally add up to nothing else but "Nothing".

Okk, On the sidelines I have also been involved in some pretty interesting discussions with the HR Team of my would be employer. And have spent decent amount of time trying to decipher the encrypted messages embedded in their replies, which usually is a one liner "We will revert back soon/shortly".

But the fact that I've failed and that too miserably at deciphering the meaning of simple words like "soon" & "shortly" means all d time spent drafting mails, plotting phone calls, startegising 4 d next round of mails/phone calls also adds up to nothing else but "Nothing".

At times I feel, all the hours spent dreaming about the good ole days spent at MDI must surely add up to something ? Not exactly, right ?

So it all finally adds up to "Nothing"... pretty depressing... especially when you consider am a freshly minted MBA - a "Change Master" in MDI parlance... raring to go all out and change the Corporate world and lives of its denizens.

But then to console my self I look at all that has happened in the world around me in this period... just sample these...

Manmohan Singh was sworn in as the PM (1st one to do so after Jawaharlal Nehru)
Deccan Chargers won d IPL
BJP is done with 1 round of Letter Writing competition
Ronaldo & Kaka are all set to join Real Madrid
No tantrums thrown by Mamta didi yet
Pakistan won d World T20
Michael Jackson is dead
Nadan Nilekani is all set to become the CIO of India
Liberhan Comission has submitted its report on Babri Masjid demolition
The Bandra Worli Sea Link is finally functional

And what have I been upto all this while... NOTHING!! Its Awesome, isn't it? :)

The First Egg-shit Poll of Elections 2009! :)

Last month or so the two IPLs (P for 'Premier' as well as 'Political') have helped me kill time and its quite a coincidence that as I write this blog post action is really hotting up in both the IPLs. Both are right now at a similar stage with likely semi finalists staking their claims. But the actual final lineup will be only clear in about a weeks time from now.

For me the IPL of the Political kind has at most times been more engrossing than the cricketing one. And today being the last day of polling, post 5PM there will be a flurry of activity on the news channels with each of them coming out with their Exit Polls (remember the EC had banned mid elections Exit polls this time around). Every news channel will have their set of psephologists/pollsters who will try to convince the viewers that there’s is the survey which is closest to the reality. Of course the real picture would only be clear as early as 10AM on 16th May.

But since all this while I too was quite hooked to the Elections I thought it was time I put all my efforts at tracking fortunes of various parties and leaders to good use. So I decided to do some number crunching and release an Exit Poll of my own. After all I have practically read every news article that's appeared in print/online media related to elections and watched all the debates, field reports on various news channels. Moreover speculation is a part of basic human nature isn't it ?

So here I am with the results of my first ever exit poll . Which I firmly believe is the first its kind as it doesn’t rely on asking few questions to a sample of 1000/10000 people regarding the choices they have made and extrapolating them for the nation. Coz with all due respect to the discipline of Statistics (which lemme confess has only grown after I underwent the Stats course at MDI :)) ) n its revered practisioners I firmly believe that such a "scientific approach" is unsuitable for Indian elections since:

• Here elections are fought on issues like caste, religion, foreign origins, strengths and weaknesses of prime ministerial candidates, fatwa’s, hate speeches etc on which 70 crore voting population has at least 70 crore views if not more
• Voting percentages vary from as low as 25% to high 65% in various parts of the country and results can be decided by margins as lows as 1000 votes to 2 lakh votes too

So my Exit poll is based on one plain simple concept:

• Common sense, gut feel, inner voice (some may call it bias towards a particular party too... but then such allegations will be leveled by politicians too tonight if the results on a particular channel don't favor them ;) )
  

Of course I have also made use of statistical data like the results of the 1999 & 2004 elections i.e. seats won, percentage of votes polled etc and non statistical inputs like field reports from various states (as reported by the Indian media - print, online as well as television), reports from friends & relatives in various parts of the country and most importantly a resulting sense of the political situation prevailing in various parts of the country.

Some intangible weight age has also been assigned to the possible impact on the voters of the election campaigns of the various parties. This includes the elections speeches, press conferences, interviews of their leaders as well as all the confusing sound bytes. Of course the impact of "Jai Ho", "Bhay Ho" ad campaigns, the huge posters of Advaniji staring at us from numerous hoardings across the country, Priyanka's saarees, Rahul's dimples has also been factored in (or so I hope ;) ).

Enough light has been shed about the methodology (or rather the lack of it) so let me come down to the results now. First up, here's The Big Picture:

	Best Case	Worst Case	Most Likely
Congress	185	115	155
BJP	155	105	135
UPA	225	140	195
NDA	205	140	175

*UPA = Congress + NCP + RJD + LJP + TMC + DMK
*NDA = BJP + SS + SAD + JD(U) + TRS + AGP + INLD
*Expected margin of error : +/- 10 seats 

As for the people interested in the so called Third/Fourth fronts they are expected to stack up as follows:

	Best Case	Worst Case	Most Likely
SP	28	20	24
BSP	30	24	27
AIADMK	19	10	16
Left	46	35	39
BJD	9	7	8
TDP	21	11	16

For the detailed breakup of state-wise predictions please click here.

So here it is Ladies n Gentlemen... the First Egg-Shit err Exit Poll of Elections 2009... n that too a good 1 hour before any news channel has come out with its own version.

Of course over the next few days it would be clear as to how close or far away from the pulse of the people I was in my analysis and predictions. But what the heck! So what if I am no Dorab or Yogendra Yadav to hang around with the Prannoy Roys, Rajdeep Sardesais of the world ? As a participant in this greatest Dance of Democracy on planet earth I too am entitled to take a shot isn’t it ? :)).

Open to comments, criticism, counter analysis, jabs, swipes...

That lazy feeling...

Its been over a month since I came back from MDI and its been spent pretty much doing nothing. Days have been spent reading 3 newspapers in a matter of couple of hours ( :) perhaps I am compensating for d 2 years at MDI when I hardly read a couple of pages of news ) , social networking, watching d coverage of Elections on various news channels besides the odd interesting IPL/Champions League encounter... all play and no work has made me a really dull man!! :))

As for this blog had lot of stuff on my mind... memoirs from a trip to The City of Joy, memoirs from Life at MDI, dissection of Indian politics, analysis of the strong leader weak leader argument, my views on the low voter turnout in Bombay and a lot more.

But then I was down with the good old procrastination syndrome. Will surely complete these long pending posts soon.

Until then!

Its all going downhill for Bombay...

Spent the major part of today on the roads of Bombay and I am disappointed, disgusted, terrified and shocked by what I saw. Sample this...

Lokhandwala complex... d roads have been dug up
On d way to Andheri station... d roads have been dug up
On d way to Saki Naka... d roads have been dug up

... n all this with the dreaded Monsoon season just a couple of months away. The MET department has already predicted high tides in the month of July of the kind never seen in Mumbai in many years. From what I saw today it would take a miracle to save the city from mayhem this monsoon!

But all this is some of the new mess that has been created... whats even scarier is the mess which existed 2 years back when I had left Bombay and has only gone from bad to worse in these 2 years... esp the two major chunks:

1. On d way to IIT... d roads are still in a mess
2. Times of India junction... d flyover is not even close to completion

In some 6-7 hours that I spent on the road today I am sure I ended up inhaling more dust, smoke and other pollutant matter than what I have in over 18 months spent on MDI campus.

My short visit to the lush green IIT campus provided some much needed respite but then the journey back home from IIT completely sapped me... it took almost the same time it used to take me about 3 years back... or perhaps it took even more time. I was so damn tired and frustrated that I had stopped keeping track by then. Dont know what the planners of the city are upto!

By the end of the day I had a running nose, burning eyes and severe headache.

Was almost teary eyed on my way home... partly due to the burning sensation caused by all the dust and smoke... but mainly because...

... I was worried for my city which now seems to be in a royal mess perhaps beyond repair &
... I was missing my lush green peaceful and pollution free campus! :|

God save Bombay!

Strange feeling...

So MDI is finally over for me... had a memorable Convocation ceremony on the 18th March (You can read about it here )

After a long night of packing my stuff, I bid adieu to my gorgeous campus. Lots of friends were there to bid farewell and it was an emotionally overwhelming moment... tried to keep my emotions in check but failed miserably.

Can't explain the feeling in words but it almost felt like I was leaving home never to return back.

On my return trip to Mumbai had Ronak for company... Life had a come a full circle in more ways than one - since Ronak was also there with me 2 years back when I left Mumbai for MDI.

All along the journey numerous moments & incidents from my Life at MDI kept flashing in my head. There was also a sense of disappointment since there were so many people whom I wanted to personally thank once before leaving but couldnt for various reasons (majorly my lazy nature :| ) ...

Jhaji for his scrumptuous samosas and chaai besides all the relaxing chats I had with him

Vijay bhaiyaa for serving us the mess food for 2 yrs...many a times long after the official mess timings

Many faculty members whom I respected and loved... for what they taught both inside as well as outside the classroom, some for the way they cared for me

and Lots of friends... for making d last 2 yrs so memorable & many a times tolerating/ignoring me :)

But guesss I ve missed out on this...

Finally when the time came to alight from the train... I felt really strange... I was back @ Bombay... My city... My home... but I wasn't happy or overjoyed... at the successful culmination of what has been a long cherished journey both for me as well as my family.

I was wondering... Why is it that I don't have a return ticket to MDI with me this time around ?

I am still wondering! :|

Real Loss...

Just finished "Good Will Hunting" a really moving story. Besides many other things there's one line which stuck with me well after the movie was over. The line spoken by Robin William in the movie is:

Real loss is only possible when you love something more than you love yourself

Post the movie... ended up booking my return ticket to Mumbai. 18th is the Convocation Day and 19th March would be The Day when I pack my stuff and head back home bringing the b-school life to a formal closure.

As I saw my credit card details getting accepted could sense the feeling of Real Loss creeping through my nerves. Guess 19th March is going to be the day when I come face to face with the feeling of Real Loss... its bound to be cause I've realized I love this god damn b-school life more than I love myself.

I wish time stands still... :|

Dawn of reality...

Early morning went to nearby Gurgaon bus depot to see off one of my very special fellow ManDevIans whom I fondly call "Sanskriti Maatey".

And as I bid her goodbye could sense she was about to breakdown, which she eventually did as we drove next to her bus for some distance. Though daybreak was still an hour or so away that particular moment ushered the dawn for me... the dawn of reality.

Reality which I have been trying to run away from for so many days now.

Reality which I know I would not be able to handle for quite some time.

That moment hit me real bad and I couldn't stop getting overwhelmed by emotions. And it was bound to happen since Maatey is 1 person on campus with whom I had a strong emotional connect.

Even before we joined MDI, just through the mails that we exchanged I could sense that she would be a really colorful and interesting person to interact with.Gradually I found that we share the same upbringing, similar value system and zest for life. I saw a part of myself in her. But then only a part it was, because it is too difficult to be Maatey.

And this I can say with great deal of confidence because in today's world its difficult to find a person as pure as she is. Honest, pure, selfless, sensitive, loving and caring person that she is I didnt spot even a hint of selfish or mean streak in her. And that has endeared her to me the most. Perhaps thats the case with most people who have been lucky enough to have her as a part of their lives.

Besides I feel it was fitting that someone so special like Maatey has made me realise that this "one long night of revelry" (as I had mentioned in my earlier post here) is finally coming to an end now.

The dawn of a new life beckons...

Thank you maatey for all the wonderful memories that you have created for me!

PS: Dawn of reality also means that I will have to start packing my stuff soon :|

Some New Experiences - Football, Twitter, Barcamp & Classical Music

Of late afternoons have been well spent playing cricket with fellow ManDevIans on the lush green fields of MDI. A luxury I would definitely miss once out of MDI. Today as we were about to end another bunch of friends had descended on the field for a round of football.

Had a strong impulse to try my hand or rather foot at football. It was my first ever attempt at Football @ MDI and I loved it. Though some tackles got scary at times and was tentative all throughout I think I will give it a try couple more times. Besides unlike Cricket it involves lot of running so would help lose a couple of kilos too which I've been trying hard ;)

Dinner was followed by a movie "Scent of a Woman". An OKish script but brilliant acting by Al Pacino. And he made some very poignant remarks about leadership in the climax which I kinda feel needs to be reiterated time and again to keep people and institutions focused.

Post that during random net surfing ended up creating a Twitter account. You can now find me on twitter here. Am a big fan of Social Networking and take pride in using Orkut and Facebook very actively. For next few days perhaps would try and get comfortable with tweeting. Also found a very interesting website to find directions to any place.

Have some fairly new things lined up for the weekend too...

Will be attending Barcamp Delhi 6th Edition which will be hosted @ MDI over the weekend. On sunday will do some Delhi darshan during the day and attend a SPICMACAY event in the evening where Pt.Ravishankar and Anoushka Shankar would be performing.

Am quite liking these new developments and the new experiences they are/would be offering.

Adios! :)

The Morning After...

As I woke up and sat in my bed
Staring into the vast empty spaces of my Change Masters room
I could feel an acute pain shooting through my Head

I sat there trying to figure out this incomprehensible feeling
And it took me quite a while to realize it's the "The Morning After..."
The Morning After a Night full of revelry

A rather Long Night...which lasted some 20 odd months
Complete with several mini Mornings Days and Nights in its each passing Moment

A rather Long Night...replete with moments each full of distinctive ManDevIan flavor
All of which I merrily guzzled with much fervor

Each little sip aroused an arrangement of assorted emotions

But I still wondered...
...this Hangover Effect is a result of which Concoctions

The Concoctions which I drank so merrily
Without ever wondering what the consequences might be

As I tried to figure out the causes of this groggy stupor
I could sense the Pain had already made its way and reached My Heart

And then My Heart finally spoke
"Don't worry son" he said...to soothe my frayed nerves

And then he continued for a while...

It's the Hangover Effect of a Heady Mixture of Life
Of which you had several Shots On the Rocks
Lives of your Fellow ManDevIans served Neat with Your Own Life

But My Mind continued to wander for a while
Then it refused to admit I was up drinking all night

But My Heart was beaming with Joy
Glad that I had revelled all night

Then I slowly recognized that this Hangover Effect I really savor
And it's going to be impossible to induce it all over again

So I decided to escape This Morning After
And go back to that bloody Night

A long night replete with moments each full of distinctive ManDevIan Flavour
And indulge in that heady Concoction of Life for one last time...

Wrote this on Saturday morning i.e. "The Morning After" my last exam at MDI and dedicated with Love to All the Lives who made up this Heady Concoction!

PS: All this while I used to joke around with people who tried to change my teetotaler ways by saying "Hum to zindagi ka nasha karte hain". Its only when I sat down to write this I realized what it actually means!

The beginning of the end...

Course work at MDI has come to an end. Many a times during the past two years I wondered how it would feel when I gave my last exam at MDI. That moment came and went last friday evening. And to my own surprise I had no feelings.

Perhaps it didnt sink in at that moment or perhaps I refused to let it sink in. Anyways the convocation would be held on 18th March and many of my batchmates have already packed their stuff and left while many others are planning to do so in the next few days.

Can already sense a strange sort of feeling spreading on Campus. But I have decided that I would be here till the Convo and live the last few days of my Life at MDI to the fullest. Have got no elaborate plans as such. I guess I'll go with the flow, try and enjoy each passing moment.

And the last couple of days have indeed been wonderful. Free from pressures of classes, prereads (not that I read a lot of late for the classes ;) ), assignments/projects (haven't contributed much to these too of late ;) ) etc. four of us went to see DevD followed by a trip to QutubMinar and Chandni Chowk on Sunday. And it was one of those days which would remain in my memory for a long time. Not that we did or saw something truly spectacular but just the overall feeling was great.

Hopefully the next 25 odd days would be full of many more such days. Slowly but surely with each passing day I can sense it is sinking in.

Its the beginning of the end as they say. But I am really not too sure whether I am ready for this end and more importantly the Life after MDI...

End of Masti Ki Paathshaala... :(

Last few days of student life left at MDI now. Just 4 more classes over the next couple of days, 4 exams in the next week and it will be all over. Perhaps the last time I would be attending classes and giving exams in this lifetime.

Curtains would soon come down on the 2 of the most wonderful years of my life I have spent @ the Masti Ki Paathshaala called MDI. Last year around the same time when my senior batch was moving out I was wondering as to what the feeling would be like in the last few days at MDI.

I thought emotions would run high and I would feel terribly sad. But so far I have been confused thinking about this phase of my life. Theres some sort of heady feeling which I am still to come to terms with.

A part of me is refusing to wake up to the reality that this is THE final stretch of my MDI journey. The day I first stepped onto this beautiful campus is still very fresh in my mind and though 2 years have gone by it feels as if it all happened yesterday.

But then such is life... all good things indeed come to an end! So the focus now is to make this end as memorable as possible.

The mantra for the remainder of stay at MDI is...

Naa koi padhne waala, Naa koi seekhne waala...
Naa koi padhne waala, Naa koi seekhne waala...
...apni to paathshala, Masti Ki Paathshala
...apni to paathshala, Masti Ki Paathshala
Loose Control!!

PS: Written in a cacophonous environment at 3AM thanks to some of my friends who seem to ve Lost Control! But then I would miss this cacophony too :)

I am sure I can fly... :)

0 chances on day 0
In casual wear by noon

1 chance on day 1
Nailed it by evening

Dream come true

Happy for a few moments
Satisfaction and Relief prevails!

My Life at MDI has come a full circle!

In the MDI interview had mentioned that I am interested in an MBA from MDI as I want to switch to Business Consulting. Faculty back then had told me that it would be difficult to get a Consulting job here. But the confident aspirant that I was I had boldly declared that two years is a long time... things would change and I would get a my desired career track from MDI.

And things did change drastically in these two years...Much beyond my wildest dreams! :)

Leave aside the confident bragging that I indulged in back then it was just a dream. But 20th Jan 2009 was the day when that dream of mine did get realized. Got the one and only shot at it in more ways than one and I nailed it. But it was not all smooth sailing , there were lots of anxious moments all through the day and need I say through the days and months preceding that day too!

Thankfully I kept my cool and didn't fall for temptations along the way. And in the few cases that I did they didn't work out. So in the end the script had a fairytale ending. Emotions, suspense, drama it had everything along the way and more so on the day it all culminated into a grand finale.

My belief in the ultimate scriptwriter of them all - the one who writes our destinies has grown even stronger now.

After all... Hum sab to rang manch ki kathputliyaan hain... Jiski dor Upparwaale k haathon mein hai!!

Thank You God! :)

Now just hoping that there's a happy ending planned for all of us in our MDI story!

I Believe I Can Fly...

I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly

See I was on the verge of breaking down
Sometimes silence can seem so loud
There are miracles in life I must achieve But first I know it starts inside of me, oh

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it
I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky...

With this belief I am ready for the days ahead... Bring em On!! :)

Hope...

Going through perhaps one of the most toughest phases of my life. Its looking dull and gloomy and its not just today's weather that I am referring to over here, there's lot of gloom all around in general.

I can sense that some are still waiting anxiously clinging to that one ray of hope. Banking on it to cast sway the dark clouds and bring lot of sunshine in their lives.

But what is worrying me is the other section - the majority one which is now tumbling down into a black hole of hopelessness.

It is getting really scary because there is nothing more dangerous in this world than a person who has lost hope. When one is completely cornered and has nothing to lose there is just one option left and that is to fight back, to give it back, to vent it out. And somehow I can sense that the general mood around me is heading towards such a scenario.

I just hope and pray to God that he takes care of not just me and the gloomy weather but all of us especially the ones who are on the verge of losing hope and belief. After all we all have to live in hope...

PS: My 50th post couldn't have been gloomier than this for sure!

Happy New Year!

Just came back from the New Years Party of MDI. As I write this I have finally come to terms with the fact that another year has come to an end. And I must admit that there is an overwhelming sense of relief at this thought. Simple reason being, 2008 has by far been the toughest year of my life. The lows have perhaps not outnumbered the highs but then I never had so many low points in a year alone. :|

So I ushered in 2009 with lots of hope rather than happiness. Hoping that this year would reverse the trend of 2008 and bring lots of cheer in my life.

On this very hopeful note wish everyone a great 2009 on all fronts!

P.S: Have made some resolutions in my head but this year I plan to give them a serious thought later today and come up with concrete ones which I'll adhere to. :)